Tools for a better marriage.
We have all heard the expression “the honeymoon is over.” It often means that the passions have cooled, and the relationship is getting harder. There may be episodes of conflict, poor communication, withdrawal, and even loneliness. What has happened, and what can we do to make things better?
The frequent response is that marriage is tough and requires hard work. That may at times be true, but this answer sounds like the description of digging a ditch, not sharing life with someone that you love. We suggest this response also misses the most important fact. Good relationships require that we have a number of “critical life skills” – and most of us don’t. We may be qualified for our jobs, and have degrees and certifications, but still be missing the skills needed to have happy, joyful, better marriages.
Inventory the issues that impact your marriage.
Ask yourself a few questions to determine whether you have the tools you need for married life.
- Do you have healthy boundaries, or do others trample on yours, or do you violate theirs?
- Are you a good communicator, or do your words fail to express what needs to be shared?
- How good is your decision making? Do you let emotions get in your way, or live in a constant “rut?”
- Can you resolve conflict without escalation, or do you just avoid tough topics until you are ready to explode?
- Do you feel validated or taken for granted? Do you validate others?
The list can go on and on, but most people realize that they could do much better. We can probably all agree that when we improve the many aspects of our relationships, we become happier.
Our weekend marriage retreat “Tools for a Better Marriage” focuses on improving the skills we all need to have the relationships we seek. We recognize that there are skills and lessons that are critical to living as a couple and they can be learned, often very quickly. Our goal is simple. We want couples to be happy, recapturing, and not losing, the joy that brought them together.